Assume a temporary or permanent restraining order has been granted in a divorce situation. The following scenarios outline the problems that could arise from restraining orders during a divorce.

Going to the lawyer’s office to discuss divorce issues such as property division

You cannot simply meet and discuss your issues if doing so would violate the terms of the restraining order (such as maintaining a distance of 25 yards in a public place). It appears as if it would be easy to agree the restraining order isn’t relevant in this particular situation, but it is not that easy. A court order is viewed with the utmost respect and severity. The majority of lawyers with any morals will prevent a client or the other party to step into that trap. It’s simple: At any time, the “protected party” can contact the authorities alleging a violation of the restraining order. And the simple truth is that if the “restrained” party is within 25 yards, for example it is a violation. Sure, it is an explainable violation once you go back to court, but it is a violation nonetheless.

Disposal of jointly owned property

Similar to the scenario above, there are times in a divorce when both parties must be present to handle the financial affairs of the divorce. Assume a couple is selling the family home and both spouses wish to be presents during the appraisal or a showing, restraining orders make this nearly impossible and expose the not-so-pleasant details of the divorce to outside parties.

Mediation classes for custody and visitation

In many counties, mediation is required before the granting of custody orders. However, if there is a restraining order in place, two parties typically cannot attend the same mediation.

Custody in general

Often a “restrained party” will have limited visitation with children during the restraining order period. The rationale is that if you are violent with “mother/father” you will be violent with “children.” In fact, those parents who are spiteful have been known to file for a TRO to maintain the custodial advantage. On the flip side, a parent who falsely accuses the other of domestic violence or sexual abuse can lose custody.

The bottom line is that parties need to think things through before filing an application for a restraining order. For those who have applied for a retraining order merely as a means of maintaining an advantage over or punishing the ex-spouse, the ramifications of such a restraining order will apply to the protected party as well. Not only does this make the everyday life of the “restrained” individual harder, but the “protected” individual also has limitations and the action might not pay off in the end.