Here are some ideas on checking out online and offline dating:

- You should be very selective on free internet dating sites. Do you want to hook up with cheapskates? Criminals and weirdoes are more common on them too. Some people want to get married to get a passport. Some want to get you to send them money for airfare or their sick mother; these are scams. Some women are looking for ’sugar daddies’; a man to sponge off of. Some are looking for someone who’ll put up with their intolerable conduct; the very opposite of a romantic relationship, where both parties look for ways to make the _other_ person happier. Conversely, if somebody has had to cough up some cash to join a dating site it means they are a bit more sincere and they’ve got a credit or debit card; a bit more reassuring, but you can still easily land a nutter.

- How will you know if a girl is interested in you? She gives you a second glance. Try smiling. If she smiles back, you’re in! It’s a myth that men gain women by chasing them. Women assess men, then give the big gits ‘the come on’. You just need the self-confidence to walk over and say hello. If you can think of a witty remark, make one. If you can’t, just smile. Say hello. Ask a pertinent question. Then heed to what she has to say. Which, if she likes you, will be a lot.

- Social skills: A man should ideally be gregarious, with an inner circle of jovial acquaintances. He ought be able to hold learned discussions on a wide mixture of subjects. A man should be observant. He should detect when a woman has changed her appearance. He ought to detect when she is distressed. When necessitated he should not stay silent, but offer compliments or sympathy. He should, however, also be aware that no man ever won a fair maiden by being meek and mild. You’re not required to put up with unreasonable behaviour. Don’t take women’s ‘crises’ too seriously. They certainly don’t. One day all is lost, the next day all is well. A strong man holds it all in. A strong woman (or a nutcase!) explodes. Regularly.

- Some women yearn for a man who is ‘macho’, overbearing, even a little bit cruel. Emphasis on the little bit. You keep her attention by appearing to be complicated and unpredictable. You may act overbearing, dominating, even a little sadistic. Watch her reactions closely when you do. If she takes pleasure in submitting to you, a glint in her eye, a suddenly more positively charged response to you; you may be dealing with a woman who unfortunately has a masochistic motivation to be mistreated and mastered. If such conduct comes easily to you, it can be very efficacious with pleasing such a woman. One caveat; masochists like their pain on THEIR terms ultimately. You’ll need to take your cue from her, not just shove her about haphazardly. Moderation is key here.

- Don’t over-think it. We are pulled to a certain type, with whom we can make a better baby; more hardy, fitter, brighter, better accommodated to its environs. Other types just don’t click with us, ‘though we can acknowledge intellectually they are attractive. It’s a heart thing, a guts thing, and parts lower down. The head merely gives its assent to a decision already made.

- Professional web dating sites are a better bet. Better yet is a specialist one. You think you’re open to all offers. In fact, in the back of your mind, you have a very specific set of criteria. Bring them to the foreground. Do you like slim or plump, tall or short, blonde or brunette, college-educated or not, extroverted or introvert? It’s smart also to go for people who are of the same religion as you. You might think it’s not critical now, but when her kinfolk start getting involved in your kid’s rearing, it will matter a very great deal.

- Women want you to like and admire and prize them. Casanova was successful with women not because he was good-looking or exuberant (he was rather plain in looks), but because he truly appreciated them. The archetypical latin lover is very attentive and complimentary to his quarry, and treats her like a princess, a donna. He says she is the most gorgeous woman in the universe, and means it. Oh, she laughs at this, but see how she shines too. Most men treat women like an alien specie, or objects to be acquired, as s-x toys, or as moody illogical nuisances. A man that accepts a woman just as she is, with honest-to-goodness admiration, can have any woman he wants.

- Find somebody who lives or works near you. A ten-mile radius is about the limit; five or less is better. If you can’t get together easily you don’t have a relationship; it’s harder to go to a public house or a cafe or just go for a walk together spontaneously. Long-distance relationships only work for married people, for a short time; even then, soldiers still get divorced or the missus commits adultery or he does.

I hope these few handy ideas will assist you in finding a nice girl via online or offline dating.

About the author: N. Svengali is an author for free dating service and personal growth internet sites in London, UK.